I see a lot of articles and blog posts about marriage and I was thinking that I need not join the fray as I’m not a marriage expert. But I can see how my marriage is thriving and it is for this reason that I would like to share what we have.
God and His Word Rule in Our Marriage
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. (2 Cor. 5:17)
Fear of God and Obedience to His Word
The Bible instructs wives to submit to their own husbands in everything.
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. (Eph. 5:24 NIV)
For those who haven’t embraced the Lord Jesus Christ and His Gospel of salvation, this would prove to be difficult (I know, I’ve been there), for the world teaches us to be independent. But even for those who have been redeemed and are walking after the Spirit and not after the flesh, this would seem to be daunting and challenging at times. I know because I face the same struggle every now and then.
My fear of God and my great desire to obey His Word stop me from fighting with my husband when we have disagreements or speaking in high-pitched tones when I’m irritated or provoked. In such difficult situations, this remembrance of His presence and His Word always makes me pause and think before I speak.
…Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man. (Ecc. 12:13)
For what is a marriage without love? Love is the concrete mix that makes every component in a marriage stay knitted together, built up and sturdy. It is love that sees a married couple through their vows in sickness or in health, in sorrow or in gladness, in suffering or in celebration, in poverty or in wealth, until death do them part. A love that sacrifices and endures.
This love that we know and have is from God, but we need to water it for it to stay healthy and flourishing. We do it by regularly seeking the Lord’s face, worshiping with all our hearts and praying unceasingly, for it is God who gives the increase. Apart from God, we cannot have true, long and lasting love, for God is love. Sing to the Lord together and pray fervently together and for each other.
The Bible instructs wives to honor their husbands and the husbands to love their wives as their own bodies.
So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. (Eph. 5:28-29)
Prayer and Fasting
My beloved husband and I hadn’t been in wonderful terms the past week. It seemed like there were feelings of heaviness and tiredness between us. I was feeling a bit piqued, too, hurt and sad overall. Then he left for the fasting house in a nearby province for three days to offer fasting and prayer. When he came back, everything was different. I cannot exactly describe it but the heaviness was lifted off and there was pure gladness and eagerness between us. It was like magic if I may say so. Just like that – the love was refreshed and the romance was rekindled.
The Lord has swept clean our hearts and minds of all negative thoughts and feelings. He made them fly away. This is the power of God working in our lives, for a marriage needs more. It needs more than us. It needs Him.
It’s a great thing to have date nights with our spouses, but even if we don’t have, simple pleasures that we share together should spark the romance.
Marriage needs much more than all the efforts of a husband and wife combined, for marriage is a sacred thing ordained by God. There must always be a third-party in a marriage, and that is the Lord Jesus Christ.
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. (Ecc. 4:12 NLT)