“The Wrestlings” Discussion {Chapter 7}

The title of chapter 7 of my ebook The Wrestlings Along the Narrow Path is Weeding Out Marital Woes. Before I went to bed last night, I prayed to God to help me – what I should write about it, how I should be giving. In the early morning, the inspiration I prayed for came, and it stole my remaining hours of sleep.

(image from Google)

Do you feel that the ship of your married life looks like it has gone through many a storm in the turbulent seas? Does it look like to your eyes as battered, sails are torn and barely hanging onto the mast, some parts dilapidated, broken? Oh, but the poor ship is still sailing out there, though buffeted, remains determined.

Aren’t you thankful that through the fierce storms, the One cord of the threefold cord has remained intact and stood His ground? The One line (a sailor’s word for a rope) that joins the other two to make a threefold rope strong and steadfast has been unfailingly faithful and held? And continues to hold for He is a Rock upon which your marriage is founded? An Anchor when angry waves threaten to break the ship – the marriage – apart?

Are you embarrassed to let people know and see the condition of your ship, ashamed that it’s not as others’ are – sleek, handsome, a thing to flaunt? But, do you realize that every torn part of your ship that was mended, every repair, every break, every scratch – you see the amazing grace of God? Can’t you see that your ship bears the marks of the Lord Jesus Christ? Hurt, broken, struck upon, but it continues to stand? Isn’t this the beauty that comes from the Savior? The unwavering strength and steadfastness that come from the One who has redeemed the lives that make up the ship?

Display how amazingly gracious the Lord has been to your marriage! Many times when you wanted to give up, when you shouted with all your strength that you want out – He has stayed. Held. When you have lost faith to your spouse, to the marriage – He remained faithful. His unfailing love was the lighthouse guiding your ship towards home.

He never  and will never let that the thing that He has put together be severed by man, circumstances, trials.

So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. (Mat. 19:6)

What God has joined together… He has done it, why will you think of undoing it?

When, in moments of anguish, you have cried out to God, questioning if your marriage is a big mistake from the beginning, think. He knows you from the foundation of the world. He knows everything about you before they came to be. And even though you have made colossal mistakes in life, when the Lord called you and redeemed you – He made all things new! (See 2 Cor. 5:17). If your salvation is not a mistake but the best thing that ever happened to you, isn’t your marriage included which is a part of you? Didn’t He redeem it also? He did! Because what He has joined together, He will not let severed.

So, if you embrace the truth that your marriage is not a mistake, give your best to make it work. The Author of marriage is before you, at your side, behind you, to give you all the support that you need!

But you say that there have been too many a painful time and oft that you have exchanged ugly words and these have cut deep. And remained. Too stubborn to be completely shaken off. But I show you the light; the Lord Himself shows us how to begin anew – everyday! He Himself renews His mercy towards us every morning. Without fail!

22 Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
23 They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness. (Lam. 3:22-23)

If His mercy towards us is new every morning, we can do the same. Yesterday is past, we can give and receive new mercies today! Give and receive new mercies today – to your spouse, to yourself. This is the door through which you can escape the clutches of the ugly, painful past.

I know that most of the reasons for the difficulties, the seemingly never-ending contentions and strifes, come from refusal to surrender to the Word completely.

 Husbands, love your wives as yourselves. (Eph. 5:28-29)

Wives, submit to your own husbands in everything. (Eph. 5:24)

These commandments are hard to completely surrender to without the Holy Spirit’s help. Let the power of the Holy Spirit move mightily in us. That we will be able to surrender to and obey the commandments of the Lord. For through the years of our marriage sailing through rough or placid waters, our love is not what is at the forefront, but the honoring of the vow and the obeying of God’s commands.

Erratum: The title of chapter 6 should have been Lessons in Love and not Lessons on Love. My earnest apologies for the mistake; I realized it much later.

The Wrestlings Discussion Series:

The Wrestlings Discussion {Chapter 1: Eyes of Envy}
The Wrestlings Discussion {Chapter 2: Envy, Competition, and Covetousness}
The Wrestlings Discussion {Chapter 3: Heart of Covetousness}
The Wrestlings Discussion {Chapter 4: Jealousy}
The Wrestlings Along the Narrow Path {Chapter 5: Eyes on Jesus}
The Wrestlings Along the Narrow Path (Chapter 6: Lessons in Love}

I might be linking up with these lovely blogs.

Journey with Jesus,


  1. Salina says:

    Oh Rina!!! Through tears, I shout a big Amen!!
    Thank you for your beautiful words of truth, such a blessing to me today.

    • RinaPeru says:

      My heart is surely filled with gladness, Salina, that these words from Him have blessed you today. All glory to our loving Savior!

  2. I love this! His grace is truly the only thing that keeps our ships afloat.

    • RinaPeru says:

      Lifting up my praise together you, Kendra! His grace – we are nothing without His grace!

  3. Hazel Moon says:

    Thank you for sharing your thought on marriage and likening marriage to a sailing ship – at “Tell Me a Story.” Awesome post!

  4. Jerralea says:

    “The One line (a sailor’s word for a rope) that joins the other two to make a threefold rope strong and steadfast has been unfailingly faithful and held? And continues to hold for He is a Rock upon which your marriage is founded? An Anchor when angry waves threaten to break the ship – the marriage – apart?” This makes me think of the song, The Anchor Holds.

    The words you have written are so true. We must make a decision to honor our vows and obey God’s commands.

    • RinaPeru says:

      It is indeed a decision, Jerralea. And we had began making that decision on our wedding day :).

  5. Sharon says:

    Beautiful words of encouragement! I know you are touching many people with this post.

  6. Yes, Rina. This is all true. But sometimes there is no joy in it…just duty. To my husband, to my Lord. Still, He makes it enough. and when the joy does not come from my circumstances, it can come from Him.

    • RinaPeru says:

      So very true, Mrs. P. Your words are always laced with wisdom! Thank you for sharing your thoughts here. Really grateful.

  7. Ann says:

    Your words are so true and so empowering, full of hope, Rina! There are days our hope may falter, but His NEVER does! Thanks for sharing. I really needed to hear these words of encouragement in my own life! Blessings,
    Ann @ Christ in the Clouds

    • RinaPeru says:

      “There are days our hope may falter, but His NEVER does!” ~ thank you for this beautiful contribution to this post, Ann! Blessings!