The year is drawing to an end which gets us in the mood for counting. Counting the blessings and thanking God for each one. For that’s the least we can do. For most people, they will be counting how many vacations they had, how many new signature bags, shoes, accessories, and expensive jewelries they invested in, and properties they have acquired. On the contrary, I know that for my beloved brethren in Christ, they will be counting the myriad miracles received: the healings, deliverances, problems solved, every answered prayer, every moment spent in the glorious presence of the Lord. I would love to do that, too. Our family will be making a gratitude list which we will share on New Year’s Eve when we are gathered around the table for dinner.
I don’t have vacations or even dinners at restaurants to count. Would you think that I’d be inclined rather to count the many long hours that I suffered and struggled for breath? My days are peppered with them, but, no, no, no. I will not focus on the enemy’s work. I love and honor my Lord and King so much I just want to give Him glory in my life.
I rather want to ponder on the passing year – whether I had grown closer to the Lord and followed His will or followed more my own will and selfish desires. Am I closer to being like His image, or am I still pursuing that which will make the world admire me? What drives me mostly to do the things that I do? Is it genuine love for the Lord and His commandments? Or is it tinged with ulterior motive which I am even ashamed to disclose? Or, can I even decipher the difference?
The Lord knows I’m trying to be authentic in all things. I’m learning that there is no life that is acceptable to God other than an authentic one. Hypocrisy is out. We make mistakes but we are humble to own them. We become “ugly” but we are quick to repent and ask for forgiveness.
As I look back at the passing year, what amazes me most are the epiphanies that the Lord is wont to bring me. Yes, even in and out of suffering. Then, there are the endless lessons. Lessons that, I believe, are making me more polished in my journey of faith. And the showers of inspiration! How can I forget them? It’s the shining inspirations from the Lord which prod me to go on, even when suffering does its best to destroy me.
Epiphanies. Lessons. Inspirations. Those I can count. But there are also the stumbles, the expressions of anguish (read: complainings), the discouragements. But you know what? All these dissipate and are covered in the face of God’s enduring mercies. His MERCIES – there’s no counting them. The Lord’s mercies – I have a wealth of them. In terms of the Savior’s mercies, I am rich.
For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren.
What are you counting as the year draws to an end?
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