Even So, His Grace is Sufficient

One morning last week as I exercised my legs using my walker, just making small steps as I swayed with the music, I was suddenly gripped by a wave of strong emotions. Agnus Dei was blaring from my docked iPod and I was looking closely at my feet as they made the slow steps, then I felt my spirit lifted up and tears sprang to my eyes. The instinctive feeling was that of self-pity, then rightly followed by hunger. Hunger to become well and strong and walking and going places to win souls. Eleven years ago, I was walking and working and traveling. But all that ceased.

Even so…

I feel the fierce love of Jesus everyday. I’ve learned to rest in that love which never condemns, never rejects and drives away, and never ever grows cold.

I make mistakes. My weaknesses frustrate me to the point that I berate myself and sometimes I can’t fully accept and love me.

Even so…

He’s teaching me everyday that in missteps I learn to walk straight. That through my mistakes and weaknesses, He breaks me, so I might learn to be strong and courageous. To overcome. To study and analyze, to think deeper. To learn the lessons and know Him more. And yet, He does it all in the circle of His love. He loves me even when I try to reject myself. This is grace.

Many times I think of myself as not victorious, but defeated. As unworthy and unlovable.

Even so…

He doesn’t fail to draw me near Him. When I bow down and humble myself before Him with tears of repentance and hunger to feel His heart, with my song of worship more whispered than sung, He is ready to meet me. He dances with me even as my legs could hardly make the steps. How can I ever think of trading this undeserved love for anything in the world? For if I have Jesus, I won’t have lack of anything.

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness…” (2 Cor. 12:9)

One time, my beloved husband came into the room while I was doing walking exercises with my waker. Through It All was playing in my docked iPod. He came near and held me and tried to dance with me. Just like old times. But I was sad. Illness and suffering and sorrow bowed down my head.

Even so…

My Savior, the King of kings and Lord of lords, is the lifter of my head.

But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me;
my glory, and the lifter up of mine head. (Ps. 3:3)

So, I trudge on. For He is ever with me. From here to eternity.

Dear reader, these words are for you, too. They are dedicated to you.

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Journey with Jesus,

Comments

  1. Joanie Qualls says:

    Yes, Rina, so true. I identify in another situation.
    Hugs,
    Joanie

  2. kd sullivan says:

    Even so…his grace is sufficient…for you, for me, for whatever the situation. Good Word!

  3. Beth says:

    God goes to such great lengths to show us His love and grace, doesn’t he? In our darkest places, His light shines the brightest. Praying with you in gratitude for grace, but also for continued healing. Thank you for posting at Unforced Rhythms.

    • RinaPeru says:

      Thank you, Beth. It’s in His undying love that I bask in everyday and I’m finding out that that is enough.

  4. Trudy says:

    So beautiful and hope-filled, Rina. It touches a deep place in my heart. I’m so sorry your walking is limited, Rina, but you are making such a difference right here right now. I love the photo and message! And thanks so much for reminding me – “He loves me even when I try to reject myself.”

    • RinaPeru says:

      Everyday, Trudy, we need to learn about and live and rest in this perfect love that the Lord freely offers.

  5. Ronja says:

    This is such a beautiful, encouraging post! I really needed this reminder of love and grace today, that God is with me in this journey and He is teaching me every step along the way. Praise God for His goodness!

  6. I love the picture you paint with your words. So moving!

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