New Mercies

New mercies. New precious lessons that will last throughout eternity.

I thought that during the long years of my trials through sickness and suffering, I had learned most of life’s lessons, that is, the hard and deep ones, really important ones, that I needed for my faith journey. I thought that I had somehow passed them and was already sailing farther towards the open seas, bluer oceans, and deeper waters. But I was wrong. In this current season of harder and more painful trials through same physical afflictions, I’m realizing that I had barely scratched the surface when it came to a completely surrendered holy life in the Lord.

Not that those years wrought with painstaking learning had been in vain, but that fresh grace and wisdom are showing me that there is more to consecrated, faith-filled life than what I was already living. Apostle Paul called it mastery.

And every man that striveth for the mastery is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a corruptible crown; but we an incorruptible. (1 Cor. 9:25)

Faith and Prayer Life

In the past years, I did trust God in everything in my life but I’m realizing now that there had been more fear than faith. That I had let fear operate in my life and let it call the shots. That although I thought I was trusting God completely, there were many occasions where I lacked confidence in Him, where I let trepidation reign in my heart for days, weeks, and months while I waited for God’s answer to my prayer.

I thought I had been praying enough everyday, but now that I am doing relentless, importunate, hounding-God kind of prayers with sturdier confidence that comes from knowing Him more intimately through the Word – I am experiencing more victories and a steady flow of peace.

I am combining the power of the Word, which I continue to read, ponder on, and memorize by heart, and steadfast and deeper faith to lift up prayers that are not punctuated with worry but with peace and confidence. I am learning now more than ever to unclutter my mind with all things that contradict or weaken faith and rest in the truth that God is sovereign.

When the Lord leads us to deeper, bluer waters, He will also grow our faith proportionately. Deeper waters call for deeper spiritual maturity.

Marriage and Other Relationships

One other thing I’m currently learning is to intentionally love, appreciate, and honor my husband despite his own share of faults and failings. To do that I must learn to acquiesce, submit if you will, to his decisions that I know will turn out for our good in the long run without feeling resentful. Most of the time in the past, those frantic responses that resisted my husband’s leadership and decisions had emanated from a place of fear: of unconsciously insisting to take control of things and wanting to stay safe within my comfort zone.

But with spiritual maturity comes also the realization that faith, sturdy faith in God, is active and not passive. Faith is taking courage, stepping out, and trusting God will come through for us.

In the past, my acquiescence to my husband was mostly triggered by my fear of offending God and my illness worsening in the process, not from gladness in relinquishing control and humble submission. Hence, there had been much misery, resentment, and self-pity on my part. I’m learning that it is far more excellent to show humility that flows from a pure, surrendered heart.

Mostly, the important lesson I’m relearning at present is to relinquish control, trust God, and live my days choosing joy. Surrender is a token of trust.

Although there is always that desire to be in control of one’s circumstances, if you’re sick and weak, frustration is what you’ll end up with, because in reality, you feel overwhelmed and unable to cope up with all the happenings around you. But that is exactly what the Lord wants to fix: our being weighed down by our burdens. He wants us to:

Come to Him.

Lay down our burdens.

Learn from Him for He is gentle.

His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

He will give us rest.

It is hard to live with sickness and suffering and physical weakness. But opening my heart, mind, and soul wide to God’s love and provision is freeing and invigorating.

With sickness and suffering, it is easy to dwell on negative things – impatience, grumbling, unkindness and unloving ways which find their roots in bitterness – and be wearied by them. But that is not the path God wants us to take. With our trials, He is actually sanctifying us to live victorious, holy lives. As we find rest in Him.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience [steadfastness]. But let patience [steadfastness] have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. (James 1:2-4, annotations mine)

Whether we like it or not, it is under the atmosphere of trials that we truly learn.

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Journey with Jesus,


  1. Hazel Moon says:

    Beautifully written to encourage us to also submit to the will of our Father God as we submit to our husbands and those in authority. Our thoughts are often troubled, but as we turn to Jesus he brings us peace and comfort. I am so thankful for God’s word, and that it is both food and drink to our spirits and in Him is perfect rest. Thank you for sharing your heart with us here at Tell Me a Story.

    • RinaPeru says:

      True, dear Hazel. It is only when we focus our whole being to our Lord Jesus that things begin to shift on our favor.

  2. MB says:

    Oh yes, I know how it feels to think you’re hitting the open water when suddenly… Nope! God has something else in mind. *sigh* :)

    • RinaPeru says:

      …and more often than not, we are clueless as to where He wants us to go :( . That is, until we give our full attention to Him and be receptive to His voice.

  3. I enjoyed reading your post and your testimony on your blog and seeing the photo of your beautiful family. It is a joy to meet you at Weekend Brew!

  4. Mary Geisen says:

    Thank you for your words of complete surrender to God today. In laying down our sins, barriers and challenges, we open ourselves to God to work mightily in us. Blessed you shared this at The Weekend Brew.

  5. Rina, thanks for sharing your story. It is inspiring to read about the increase in your faith, how you are memorizing scriptures, and how your prayer life has deepened while going through trials. May the Lord continue to bless your ministry of writing.


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